Culture Shock

When moving to Crete be prepared to experience culture shock. Even if you
have spent many holidays on Crete, and think that you know the country and
the people well it can still manifest itself when you are out of holiday mode and
start dealing with a new life. After the initial excitement you may discover that
you feel lost and encounter difficult times and crises in daily life; not knowing
how to do simple things that you take for granted in your home country.
Communication difficulties will occur and it can be very frustrating not being
understood or not understanding.

What exactly should you expect and how can you overcome it?

The following article gives you some answers.

Reproduced with kind permission of Simon Payn www.livingabroadreport.com
The ability to cross cultures is essential if you are to live overseas successfully.
Indeed, a mark of the international citizen is the ability to fit in.

If you can't do that, not only will you be unsuccessful but you'll be unhappy too.
Getting on with people from other cultures is paramount. After all, you will be
thrown into all sorts of situations - at work or in your personal life - where you
will need the help and support of people from cultures other than your own.

Those who are successful in an international career are able to adapt to other
cultures. Indeed, employers when hiring look for someone who will feel at home.
After all, who wants to be a fish out of water, and who wants to hire one? It
would lead to disaster.

But more fundamentally than that - if you fail to adapt to your new culture,
you're going to be unhappy. And unhappy people end up going home.

If you are continually feeling like you don't belong and that you don't
understand the society in which you find yourself, you are going to be feeling
continually isolated and frequently frustrated.
That's no way to live - and it's certainly no way to succeed.

So what does culture shock feel like?

When you're used to things being one way, suddenly being somewhere where
things are quite different can be a huge shock to the system.
It's as if all you ever knew is wrong. People don't behave in the way you expect
them to behave; things don't happen the way you expect them to happen.

This experience is called "culture shock".

Craig Storti, in his book The Art of Crossing Cultures, is careful to make the
distinction between country shock and culture shock.
What is this difference?

Country shock is the shock at the physical differences you encounter in your
new home; the different standard of living, perhaps, or the language. It's the
very fact that you are somewhere new - you don't know where anything is or
where to get help. You are lost.

This would be bad enough. But on top of that comes culture shock proper. And
with this, we're talking about the people.

The way people behave differs according to the culture in which they have been
brought up and live. Something that might be culturally unacceptable to you
might be perfectly acceptable to them - and vice versa.

An example if queuing - or getting in line. In Britain and North America, people
know how to queue. Indeed, it's said the British like nothing better than a good
old queue.

Go to Spain, (and here in Greece!) for example, and it's just the opposite. There's
a queue or sorts but, in the words of Expatica's excellent blogger Sal DeTraglia,
it's "three-dimensional". There's no easy to understand line but rather a huddle
of people, most of them shouting to get attention.

It's these fundamental differences that lie at the heart of culture shock.

Culture shock doesn't come on as soon as you step off the plane. Indeed, the
first few days and weeks often feel like a holiday. It's known as the honeymoon
phase - you are so happy to be in this exciting new location that you are blind
to its differences and any faults you will later perceive.

But then culture shock sets in. You start to be aware of the culture around you,
and you don't feel comfortable in it. You feel you are being continually assaulted
by events, and you start to feel stressed and uncomfortable. You can even start
to hate your new home and the people within it, to the point of being ready to
leave and go back home ..

This period can last for a few weeks - until you start to take control. Then you
start to recover; you find the skills you need to cope with culture shock and
start to beat it. That's when you can finally be said to have adjusted - to be
functioning properly as a foreigner in a foreign culture.

How long will this process take? It depends on many factors, such as how
different the culture is to your home country and the tools you need in order to
accept that culture.

Culture shock begins when the honeymoon ends - when you have to take off
your rose-tinted spectacles and face the real world. It manifests itself in many
ways.

You will become aware of silly misunderstandings with people you meet. These
can lead to general confusion about people and events. Aspects of the country -
things that are 'not like at home' - start to get to you. You perceive these things
to be so much worse than at home - and you can't seem to understand why
things are not done the way they are back home. After all, the way you are
used to seems so much more sensible, so much more efficient, so much more
pleasant. You start to resent the country for not being like home; for annoying
you with its inconveniences, its difficult people. You even start hating the place
where you live.

All this leads you to start to feel lost. There feels like there is nothing to hold on
to - no familiar places, rituals, sayings. You can start to feel lonely.

And when you start to feel isolated and lonely, it can get even worse. You lose
confidence in your ability to cope - things start to get difficult in your everyday
life at work. Your ability to function is reduced - you're too busy stressing about
the culture that you can't concentrate on the task in hand. Tasks that were easy
back home are enormously difficult. You can no longer take things for granted.

The point is: if you stay in this state, you will be unhappy. You might end up
throwing the towel and going back home. Indeed, culture shock is one of the
main reasons that people stop living abroad.

But luckily there is a way to fit it and succeed abroad.

I'm not going to tell you that getting over culture shock is easy. But here are
perhaps the three most useful ways to put an end to culture shock - and
perhaps nip it in the bud before it starts.

First - research. It goes without saying that it helps to know what you are
getting into before you get into it. If you are expecting the country and its
people to be a particular way, you won't be shocked when you get there. So
research as many aspects about the country and the people as you can. Luckily,
there are many resources out there to help you in the form of websites and
books.

Next - accept that people won't be the same as you. It seems simple, but by
making this paradigm shift, the shock doesn't seem so, well...shocking.
If you are expecting someone to behave towards you as you would back home,
you'll be shocked and upset when they fail to do so. But if you expect absolutely
anything to happen - and you accept it - you can't be as shocked. So instead of
comparing their behaviour to that you would expect back home - and comparing
it unfavourably - just say to yourself that it is different. Not worse, not better -
just different. Now, you don't necessarily have to agree with this way of
behaving - but it won't get to you quite as much as it did before.

Finally - get out there and get yourself muddy. It's easy to give into the urge
when culture shock sets in of staying at home and locking yourself away from
the outside world. But this is the worst thing you can do. You must go out there
and confront it, go and keep yourself busy and start meeting people. Not only
will that take your mind off the shock you are feeling, but it will also bring you
close to ways of understanding the culture. The more you are exposed to it, the
more you will see how normal (in that particular country) that behaviour is, so
the more you will accept it. And if you are able to meet other people -
particularly expats - they will be able to share your frustration...but also help
you find a way through it.

Simon Payn
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